100% of [active] Full Tilt players not already being paid weekly automated payments should have received their first automated weekly payment yesterday. Full Tilt have also informed of a slight delay in stats whilst they fix a reports issue.
Judging by the number of players who have queried our industry-beating CS about their RakebackSTAT FTP account balances this week, our joy at catching up with so many of you was tempered by the realisation so many are missing out on our very entertaining - that's our objective opinion and anyone who believes otherwise is a fool - and informative [some are even coherent] news articles.
We'll generally post these rollicking rambles on the homepage when the issue affects an entire room as we like to keep the Internal Ticket system free of bulk emails and the number of our external emails being sent to Spam folders forced our very neurotic creative writing genius to storm off the job cussing and using the Lord's Name in Vain. Which he was dismissed for, upon sheepishly returning to work in a style clearly inspired by Seinfeld's George Costanza.
We are God-fearing men and women here at RakebackSTAT and by God, we will protect His Name from being used in vain. Or in Spain. On the plain. Or in the Rain. Audrey Hepburn was more god than God ever was. Let us have a moment of Silence for Audrey's amazing.
***INTERMISSION / ONE MINUTE OF SILENCE FOR AUDREY***
Let's get down to business.
1. Our news updates are god and you should be reading them.
2. If you were not already on the automated weekly payment system [signups to Full Tilt April 2010 onwards], and have played in July, you should have received your first automated weekly payment yesterday.
3. Stats will be unavailable for a short time for Full Tilt due to an error at FTP's end [we are infallible, ourselves] regarding report formats. We are told this will not be an issue for long.
4. When you contact our CS, please notch up the settings on Wit a tiny bit. It's not a prequesite. But a man [or woman] oblivious to the concept risks flirting with Idjit.
5. I got on the Psychic Octopus literally at the start of this WC and am almost Oprah Rich in almost wagers on Octopus selections. Anyone who would dispute his genius is no friend of ours. We suggest loading up on his final two selections [he's 100% so far this WC] and feeling pretty good about it. That's Spain for the big W and Germany for the lolz w. Bet your shirt, the farm, your sexuality - and don't sweat it - the Octopus knows all.
In closing, speaking of sexuality, ruminate on the below wisdom...
Why fight it?
And we believe Nike is reneging on an implied pre-tournament promise?
